Faithless Fear

Psalm 94:17-19 - Unless the Lord had given me help, I would soon have dwelt in the silence of death. When I said, “My foot is slipping,” your unfailing love, Lord, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy.

My heart groans within me,

even my bones turn against me.

With every moment of fear,

I cast doubt on the Lord.

In every moment that I am afraid,

I disobey the status of my God.

Is not Your power,

greater than my thorns, O Lord?

My unbelief

causes me to fear,

which leads me to sin.

O, how my life would never be the same,

if I had a mustard seed.

Just a drop,

only a fraction of faith,

and I would never be the same.

My minds turns me in, Father,

my thoughts are the evidence,

evidence of all that I lack.

In the root of my trembling,

my guilt is revealed.

You are all that I need, O Lord,

yet You are not enough for me.

You are all that I long for, O God,

yet I rely on everything but You.

What will it take,

faithless flesh of mine,

to put your hope in the Lord?

I will call to You, mighty Creator,

until my lungs give out.

Humble me,

bring me to ruins,

if it means I can taste the fullness of Your

love.

Amen.